I think I have finally come to the somewhat unfortunate (depends on one's perspective here) realisation that never mind sugar etc. is bad for me, but I cannot put it in my body anymore. My body is maxed out. Yesterday was a horrible day. I ate nothing but cookies, and then some leftover Chinese food later in the day. Seriously...nothing but cookies from 7:30 am until 6:00 pm. And while it actually wasn't a lot of cookies (about 6 or 7 I believe), but not eating anything in a day other than sugar and then topping that with greasy Chinese? Lord I was hurting. Truthfully, even by lunchtime yesterday I was feeling sick (this was about 3 cookies in btw), and I wasn't hungry so I didn't eat the nice healthy quiche I had brought (it had spinach AND kale in it! There were major brownie points in that quiche! Homemade too...so not even processed...sigh). My head was killing me and I could barely keep my eyes open they hurt so much. I was getting chills even though my office was perfectly warm. I felt no other symptoms, so I can't attribute it to the flu or anything, but boy did I not feel well. I even told my manager as a head's up, like hey, don't know what's going on, but I'm not feeling well and worst case scenario I won't be here tomorrow.
When I got home I had dinner and I thought I would feel better, but obviously it matters what you eat cause eating leftover Chinese didn't help matters.
I went to bed at 9:00 pm and I was sweating, even though with it being -20 outside right now, it's not like my home is super duper warm.
And today? Well I did call in sick because I just felt so run down and achy. And the cravings? Holy crap the cravings. I want sugar. I crave sugar. I cannot think about anything but sugar. I can't think about anything but food period. Never mind being annoying, it's frickin scary. I will not let this happen again. I will not go back to the 160s and feel tight and chubby and gross.
It's just an eye-opener to me just how bad that food made me feel. I haven't had that reaction before. Bad food is bad for you, yes I know...but I've never had that physical reaction to it before (well except the whole ear ache thing when I eat McDonalds).
My body is literally crying out for healthy non-processed food. I have to take this as a sign and move forward and leave the junk behind. I just can't do it anymore. I had made that choice relatively easily back in Sept-Dec. Time to do it again. I don't want this feeling to come back. I'd much rather have that feeling of satisfaction that I am doing well for myself and moving in the direction I want.
Rough lesson, but hopefully lesson learned.